I checked in with my mom after I heard that the Adirondaks had been cursed with some flooding. My immediate thought was "Did my childhood home get swept away by yet another storm of water?"
It almost was, once, during hurricane Irene.
But it was not a rainstorm that yielded a swords path, it was an emotional storm that devastated what seemed to be a happy compromise of work and life, between my mother and her new (40 years now) husband.
My father died in 1980, his young wife supplicated his painful and miserable death by cancer. He didn't drink, or smoke, it was just - cancer. He lived a blessed life, married a beautiful wife, lived a blissful indulgence of art culture, and eternal learning, wrote about his discoveries, and made a bit of money publishing books about his discoveries on the process of making graphics, art and whatnot. He taught me the principle of "Do well at what you love, and the money will follow"
I follow, very loosely in his footsteps, I am not a 'professor' with a title as he was, but I have answers to questions many people ask, and kindly take care of strays that come my way. I am a benefactor, just as my father was.
So it pains me to know that my mom, brilliant, creative and resourceful as she is...
Landed herself in the hospital. For not eating, or taking care of herself, for being dispassioned of life, and sick of the day to day, and having to deal with a man she married who doesn't love her, or care for her anymore.
I do not question the specifics, I know all too well how we fall out as friends, but when it happens to ones we consider our life partners, then it gets sad.
I spent my last few years from 2003 to 2005 taking care of and living with my father's sister, my Aunt Mary, who I didn't really like very much, but family obligation steered me to do the right thing and take care of her in her last years. She died in my arms, I put her to rest on the floor, covered her with a blanket, and put a pillow under her now dead head, out of respect. I looked up at the ceiling thinking maybe that is where her consciousness is... and said to the empty space "So this is how it ends. Okay."
Then since it was very early, I went back downstairs and slept until I felt like waking up and dealing with the inevitable. Oh, the police came, and had a big investigation, and had lots of questions for me, took all her medication, and asked if I was selling pills she had.., well, honestly, they had to come to the table with those assumptions, because it is so prevalent. But no, Her pills had NOTHING on what I could get my hands on from my friends so, that was thankfully not an issue.
My mom was the first person I called. She knew the situation here, and she was 'on hold' I would guess, for such a thing, obviously, my aunt was old and was going to die, so it was just a matter of when. My mom and I pulled it together wonderfully, gracefully, and respectfully, neither of us really liked this person, but Aunt Mary was not evil or bad... she was just unschooled, ignorant, opinionated and bossy, and a pain in the arse for anyone who she had the unfortunate accident to come to speaking terms with. Which, was everybody. Even her husband was an unspeakable alcoholic, and catholic dependant, saying rosaries every day, and atoning for sins from a time way before he mistreated his wife my Aunt, Mary. Well, he atoned for mistreating her too. But she functioned as a dumb slave. I knew all this going into my servitude helping my Aunt Mary die. And I have no regrets, except I wish I had not gotten so angry with her when I did. A big mistake is to fault the doomed. Note to future self - don't do that.
Life lesson learned. Don't blame old people for being old and stupid. Be nice to them, and be brilliant yourself.
TL;dr.
At about this point in this awful mesmerizing troupe I am writing you are thinking, what the fuck is the point of my reading this? Is it Too Long, Didn't Read? thus [TL:dr]
Well you've made it this far, that's the buy in.
You need to know what happens next.
No aliens invade the earth or stupid shit like that. Calm down. I just want to tell you a story. So where was I?
Oh,... to be continued.
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